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Kartchner Caverns, Arizona State Park

Kartchner Caverns, Arizona State Park

By James Anthony Curtis

 

We had the pleasure of visiting Kartchner Caverns on Friday November 30th, 2018. Its hard to believe that 44 years ago, almost to the date in November, this cavern was just being discovered by Gary Tenen and Randy Tufts as they were exploring the limestone hills at the eastern base of the Whetstone Mountains. The two men dreamed of finding “a cave no one had ever found,” and indeed they found it.

As we neared the Limestone hills containing the now well maintained, manmade entrance to the caverns, we had no idea what we were in store for as we approached the entrance. The hills themselves do not sit that far from the highway, and leave little to be awed by from an outward view. There is nothing that gives any indication to the incredible beauty that awaits under the surface, and once inside its mind boggling what it must have been like coming upon this treasure in such a dark exploration. Gary and Randy were two such souls that truly felt the significance of a place like this, and kept the cave secret until February of 1978, when they sat down to share the their find with property owners James and Lois Kartchner. The two knew the cave had to be conserved, since natural wonders can seriously be damaged from unregulated usage, and a course of action was set into motion to approach Arizona State Parks about acquiring the caverns.

It’s hard to believe as you look over at the original entrance, which is hardly noticeable, that a small, dark, hole into the earth, leads to such magnificent beauty in what lays beneath. Our ranger guide was very informative, as was everyone working at the park, and you could feel the passion in his sharing each step of the way as we entered the tunnel to the caverns.

It was sunny yet very chilly outside, and as you approach the first door, you see the beginnings of tunneling into the hillside. The park takes great lengths in precaution to preserve the still actively growing cave, listing many helpful ways in which we will be walking into the cavern as to not disturb what has taken hundreds of thousands of years to form.

Upon walking through the first door, immediately the temperature is a comfortable 72 or so degrees, humid, and surprisingly pleasant. We pass through long tunnels painstakingly made for easier access into the caves, and a total of three large metal doors, sealing the outside world, and preserving the inner one.

Kartchner Caverns is one of those rare places on earth that brings you to a place deep within yourself, thats hard to comprehend the amount of time, pressure, and gravity of circumstances to create. Gary and Randy crawled, through a tiny black opening, squeezing, moving, exploring the darkness, until it opened into something ancient, magnificent, leaving a legacy of awe to what others might share. The beauty is remarkable, even more so as you realize the process in discovering it, and the truth which made it.

I found myself feeling into my own journey as we walked, those dark places yet to be discovered, and the ones that have revealed themselves through much crawling, squeezing and exploring in great effort. The ranger that took us in remarked, “its hard to believe this much beauty formed over so much time in such darkness.”

Many times in our journey it’s difficult to view our own darkness with such reverence — mostly because we get caught up in those tight places, grasping for movement, trying to reason our way through tiny limitations, when being human is really all about feeling those closed spaces. As we allow ourselves to abide with the dark, seeing past the tiny openings, our desires guide us into something much more than we could ever have hoped for.

When we are ready, may we find our ‘sink hole,’ beginning the long journey inward to see what has been forming for a very long time. May we crawl, squeeze, move at our pace, allowing ourselves to enjoy each exploration with love. And as we come to know the one we have been waiting for, may we greet ourselves with all the tenderness we have long desired, for the benefit of all beings.

May it be so, so it is. ????

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Glore Psychiatric Museum ~ “Finding our way”

Glore Psychiatric Museum ~ “Finding our way”
Saturday November 10th 2018 by James AnthonyCurtis

 

Today we visited the Glore Psychiatric Museum in St. Joseph Missouri just north of Kansas City.

St. Joseph is pleasant town, with lovely people, a rare little gem of attractions in US history. Having a commitment we are en route to, we decided on a couple of places that peaked our interest for the day. I chose the Native American exhibit, and Ciara picked the Glore Museum.

As per usual, the universe lines up what we need, even though we may balk at our circumstances. Sometimes I struggle with negative or afflictive emotions, and being in places where tragedy or strong pain was felt, vibrationally I will sense the energy stored in the items, land, and buildings that are still there. Although this happens, Ive received guidance over the years to really embrace the energies, that there are always deeper lessons, healings, expressions coming forth in the experiences that are priceless.

I’m a firm believer in learning from our history, and contributing to the process of healing by emerging myself in these areas of need that call out energetically.
I forget as a healer though, that when in exploration while sighting seeing, the impact things may have on me. This actually works to the benefit of the process sometimes, in that each experience is felt on a much deeper level, when we are unaware of what’s happening, because the mind doesn’t interfere with its analytical inquisitions or opinions.

Earlier in the day when we were choosing our destinations, its also beautiful watching the synchronicity of events that align for our desires of what we need to manifest in our life paths. Everything plays a part in coming to surface what we may realize in hindsight, as perfection is always moving all things together for wellbeing. Our conscious ‘trip planning,’ really is the tip of the iceberg in what happens on any given day.

 So we found ourselves moving through the halls of what was once labeled “State Lunatic Asylum No. 2″, renamed the “St. Joseph State Hospital” in 1899. Built in 1874, the structure has echoes of a medieval fortress, where one might suspect to find all sorts of various torture devices in the damp lower sections of its foundation walls. Although the mind might run a bit with the idea of barbaric treatment as you begin to wander the museum, instead what we found was far more revealing in nature, sinister even, — a vain attempt by our predecessors to understand dark places in the human psyche, and in failing to do so, meet them with brute force in order to bring them in line with societal codes of conduct.

In an introductory video when you first enter the museum, a modern Psychiatrist examines his own methods of treatment for the mentally ill, posing the question, “fifty or a hundred years from now, will the methods I use be thought of as barbaric or inhumane attempting treatment of the mentally ill?

As we walked from room to room, seeing the devices and various forms of treatment used in those individuals that were committed, neither of us had the words to describe what we were feeling. Knowing what I know now, working with many people that struggle with mental health, how many of these people would have been tossed to the wind as ‘abnormal,’ or ‘less than’ in humane consideration? ‘Love,’ seemed far removed from the equation, as each treatment focused more on the obedience of behavior, and awakening the individual to societal norms in thinking.

Though I do not hold those in authority or charged with the care of these people at the time responsible, it is difficult to imagine being flexible with such obstinate thinking. The fact that we are ‘evolving’ is still in debate today, drive long enough on any major highway in the US, and you will eventually see a billboard disputing evolution with a rather narrow view of creationism. And although this may seem counter productive, even resistant, and full of rigidity, we are only being served with a deepening path to practice the love we so much are calling out for in humanities shortcomings.

As I look closely, feel into the history of many of those that were housed at ‘Lunatic Asylum No.2,’ the devices used on the people, the ‘tranquilizers,’ restraints, and many methods of treatment being explored, a story begins to unfold of two lives — both intertwined in the relationship of questioning our sanity. With each whipping, dousing of water, and handling of the insane with brute force, to the more sublime encounters where some small connection might be made, both patient and counselor must have wondered what bridge they were walking on through their chosen life path. As each questioned each, why couldn’t the other see what was so revealing and important in meaning?

On the third floor of the museum is a display of crafts, artwork, and instruments that gave worth to so many in the halls where they stayed. Some venting, others broken in heart, pain pouring forth in expression, and moments of joy in once heard voices having hope of being listened to again. The evidence on this floor was overwhelming, the conclusion of contrast real, that which was opening was being opened by the innocence of love, not by the torture of oppressive obedience. Those place that are so misunderstood, dark to us in nature, even violent in their force, are merely asking for love, the attention we long seek by the demons of our desires. The artwork resonated so much with us, it brought up other great artists of our time, and we were made to wonder how many of them were seeking only to be loved, valued in their journey of introspection, so clearly translated and identified on a mass scale of human canvas in the heart of the minds eye? How many of them were merely seekers, walking the inward road, only to escape incarceration or rejection by a narrow thread had their thoughts been more openly known?

The answer is not an easy one to accept, because it means a shift in each of our personal daily lives. As we draw closer to the truth of healing, expression, and our divine nature, we also meet our ‘mirrors,’ those places we lack conformity with, that are not aligned, asking only to be loved in their cries. As humans we are in a place of unique significance, in that we are both living embodiments of earth and sky, having the capacity for greatness and awe in our movements, but only as we learn to endure our most afflictive of energies in emotion with loving embrace. As we continue to grow into our potential, those parts that come forward in what we may perceive of as ‘insanity,’ are only indications of the higher self we are coming to know as we struggle to maintain some semblance of reality. With each grounding that falls away from under our footing, we are moving inward to the uncertain path, and learning to trust in the universal weight of liberation.

 

 

May you be blessed, may you be opened when ready, free to explore those parts that are asking only to be heard by the love that you already are. May it be so, so it is.???

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Mirror, mirror…

Mirror, mirror…

By James Anthony Curtis

Rain continues this day, as I listen to the drip, drip, drip upon the gutters, grey skies holding true to their foretelling of the mood. It always amazes me how nature can be a perfect reflection of those parts within me on any given day, and when the shift comes, synchronized walls fall as the clouds move to produce the brightness of the sun. But the shift isn’t the goal, more of a byproduct of loves intrepid work in revealing the depths in deep need, each darkness claiming stake for the next round of feeling.

Some days as ironic as it sounds, I just don’t feel like feeling.

SO I wake up, go about my day, as the universe patiently waits for my readiness. Days may bleed into weeks, but not so much anymore, as once quickened, life has a way to coax us back into our attentiveness. I’m learning not to push, to prod myself or others in our chosen life path, but rather to simply allow me to flow as the person Ive come to experience this journey in.

As a healer, I’m very familiar with those coming to me for answers, but answers are different than healing. Healing can manifest in a variety of ways, but Ive never seen it arrive solely as an ‘answer.’ Mostly, healing comes as that pesky neighbor knocking at some odd hour at the back door, or the painful newscast we wince at in passing – wishing the world was a safer place. Deep healing arises almost unnoticed, maybe a forgotten dream in the night, or some ache upon waking for the day, possibly a co-worker saying the same annoying thing, complaining in our ear. These ‘feelings,’ left unattended, begin to work their festering magic, seeping underneath, into the cracks of our soul, until that day comes when we don’t ‘feel’ like going to work, we call off, crawling back into our bed.

And when ready, when there has been enough space created, we begin to examine ourselves, asking those difficult questions, maybe allowing difficult feelings.

The distance we feel, is nothing more than the space we have genuinely created, for love to close the gap between us and us. Oppression, heart-ache, sickness, and death, all reveal this great distance, the one inside that we miss, our infinite selves. But if we allow our demons to work for us, those parts that feel plagued, our eyes will come to know the truth of loves revealing, of each costumed scary character that has come forth, only as an aid to our most desired healing.

Sometimes the most potent feelings are the ones that arise out of our need to be seen, to know that we are not alone, that even in dire circumstances, all is unfolding for our benefit.

So we listen to the rain, feel the grey, hear the wind upon the trees, and allow as we allow, as we are ready to receive. We flow with the river of our true nature, granting passage for life to move as it chooses, welcoming both our resistance, and each embrace, with all the love we wish to be given, as no one else can, as we tenderly, sometimes painfully, hold the heart in all that we feel.

May it be so, so it is. ????

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To the ‘One’ whistling in the dark

To the ‘One’ whistling in the dark

By James Anthony Curtis

It’s hard to accept the arrangement of some fears, they strike with such precision, and depth, it feels as though our heart will stop. “Not being good enough,” along with the torment of “unworthiness, abandonment, and rejection,” can often leave us feeling bruised, bullied, alone…cowering in some dark corner.

But as we learn about bullies, we find that most of their lives they themselves have been bullied, and receiving little to no acknowledgement, only desiring to be heard, seen, shown the attention they lacked, come knocking at our door. Frequently they arrive with expressions of anger, hatred, and accusations of the ground we stand on, taunting us until we fold inward, sinking deeper into depression.

Some days “the fear of not being good enough” lashes out with such ferocity, that it seems as though the whole world has joined with them as a gang of torment, to all of which we feel overwhelmed, bottoming out, and with no room left to recoil, we turn towards our demons. As we face our captors, we willingly succumb, opening the door, inviting the end to be near, showing them in for as long as they wish to stay, abiding with them in the innocence of our heart.

“Come in,” we say, “I will not abandon me, nor resist you,” and feeling their presence, the deep ache, the pain gripping at our soul, they are heard.

Soon, many more of their friends arrive, ‘self-pity, poverty, cruelty, and ugliness,’ a hard looking bunch, from many years of living on the fringe of existence. They lounge wherever they please, mostly choosing to sprawl across the heart as it opens to receive them. But as they do, we do the opposite of our earthly nature, divining a way less seen, and we continue to sit, holding our heart in the midst of their chattering. Tears gently fall upon the cheeks, gravity guiding them down well-worn paths, as the ruin of our guests touches us.

‘Abandonment, rejection, and unworthiness’ complete the crowd now gathered, a full house, yet still we hold true to love, the practice of being with strong energy, and holding the heart, as each of them comes forth to be felt, listened to, seen as no one else can.

Breath by breath, we feel intimately those that are here for acknowledgement, that healing may occur as needed, with each truth of our pain.

We continue by setting aside judgements and opinions about the circumstances of each arising, simply feeling, allowing passage for cellular debris to manifest, releasing as they will; just as a sliver works its way out of the body, so to the creation serves love even in the most difficult of circumstances.

Gently bowing, each of one of our guests depart, moving on as we stand in truth, holding space for them, while loving the heart, tenderly, as gently as we can.

The sun comes forth, shining, broadening our inner chambers, and the room feels lighter, the breath easier, our healing process deeper.

The room is now empty, but somehow we fill more of it, larger, for as we have come know those parts, so to we have come to know ourselves, the one coming forth, the love that we are, for the benefit of all beings.

May it be so, and so it is.????

– From my next book: “Honoring the One Coming Forth”

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‘The brittleness of cold’

‘The brittleness of cold’

By James Anthony Curtis

As the seasons shift, and the leaves release their colors in recognition of the fall, I feel the cold reaching into my bones, searching me out in the deep of the marrow. The wind is howling outside, as it blows upon the branches, tempting the trees with foretelling of winter, and the long dark that is coming in the cycle of life’s matter. I have to remind myself, that this is natural, a part of the journey we have contracted, and that all is well, even when uncomfortable feelings grip my soul.

Although trepidation may visit the weary traveler, it is in these times that we may offer the hospitality of our heart to those places that seek to be heard in us. Fear and agitation are only guests in our house, come to reveal those parts seeking faith in the ground of uncertainty, and if we allow ourselves to abide in the discomfort of our relations with strong energy, going inward as the mighty trees do each winter, we find solace in the space of reflection, grasping not upon the sands of shifting circumstances, but holding firm in the form of our divine unfolding.

With the cold comes a natural contraction, a seeming ‘revulsion’ to the outer world, but inward, we know of something different taking place. In times past, we would come together around the fire, tell stories in the shelters we had constructed, paint upon the walls, and commune with our ancestors around the fire of mortality’s privilege. And although it may seem we have lost this connection, the universe beckons us to travel deeper into the cave of our mystery, down sacred hallways, further than we have gone before in our species.

We will find loss, but only in the derision of our unbelief; for each fate is a necessity in our evolution, in coming to realize those places within us that have come forward to be expressed.

Our lineage will not abandon us, both in future realms and those we may have forgotten from long ago, for we are all pilgrims here, spontaneously embracing our rhythms, called out by our desires. So let us gather together, just as in days of old, tell our stories in the deep of cold’s brittleness, as we warm ourselves by the fire. And may we view the pictures we have painted, come to life upon the walls, seeing our depths emerge, serving us, as what we have chosen, in love’s universe, by design.

May it be so, so it is.

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‘The sword of truth’

‘The sword of truth’

By James Anthony Curtis

Pain is the great revealer, coming forward to present itself in the most uncomfortable of circumstances, bringing forth once darkened parts to gain our attention. Even though it may seem simple enough, like when we burn our hand on a hot surface, or close our eyes wincing to the brightness of the noon day sun, underneath the surface of our sense experience, flows an intricate often enormous amount of wealth in transformation. This ‘wealth’ frequently goes untapped, for fear of what we might find, in the voice of the deep, calling out with pain as its advocate.

Often we turn aside, look the other way, ‘blame’ becoming a watchword for outer circumstances, and in our ignorance, humanity suffers, as we recoil in the sensitivity of each truth which lights upon the heart. But as all things work in an inclusive universe, if we turn away, our movement only draws us closer to that which exists in us, the hidden desires which hold dear our most precious treasures.

What an interesting discovery, that ‘truth’ walks hand in hand with our most painful of life paths, not only as pains’ confidant, but as its closest supporter, and friend. If only John Bunyan had written the mystics path, unfettered from religious dogma, what would he have said from the darkness in his prison cell?

So we move as we feel moved, some of us awaiting the edge, others in transition, each of us collecting what we need for our journey in wellbeing.

It’s funny how it goes, for even in writing this now, relief enters, as the vibration is acknowledged, floating ease-fully to the words upon the pages. Which leads yet to another door, in speaking volumes of our divine nature we have come forward to express in each incarnation. For if we are to blossom, unfold our wings, we must journey as we are called, each of us responding to the thunder within us, even as we may buckle purposefully in surrender; for death awaits no man, and works in cooperation to each creation.

So let us feel, dancing to the pain of each truth, granting passage to the music which life brings us, and if we must, with each ‘selah,’ form our own judgements, opinions, about the circumstances that surround us. And as every horror comes true, remember what we asked for, the shedding skin, as we gain upon each nightmare in full view.

It was never about ‘them,’ they were only participants, its your time, your dime, given solely for this uncovering anew.

Book of Horrors, Volume 1, “It’s your Funeral”

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Workshop Saturday November 3rd at Wellspring Home & Garden

Upcoming Workshop on Saturday, November 3rd at Wellspring Home & Garden!

This next Saturday, another look into “Understanding our Manifestations” & “Befriending Pain!” A large “Thank You” to Wellspring Home and Garden for hosting this event!

We will explore our relationship with the universe as we walk the ‘inward path,’ giving attention to those parts in need within us asking for love and healing.

Breakfast will be provided, compliments of our most gracious hosts! See you soon!

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Upcoming Workshop!

So excited for this upcoming workshop to be held in my hometown of Warren Pennsylvania!

Looking forward to this gathering of lovely souls as we explore the heart in journey here in our life paths!

The topics for this gathering will be “Understanding Manifestation” and “Befriending our Pain,” with an intermission in between. Blessings, gratitude and much love as always, hope to see you there!

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“Trust in the Universe”

“Trust in the Universe”

By James Anthony Curtis

If we truly want to heal, we begin by embracing fully how we feel, breathing it in, abiding with strong energy, all while holding the heart, telling ourselves, “I will not abandon you, nor reject, in all that I feel.”

Many times we are born into circumstances specific to our vibrational patterns, desiring to heal those parts that are triggered by the reflections around us. The people, environments, and events in our life that get under our skin the most, are those benefactors that have been sent to reveal once darkened parts within us that are need of healing. We resist, because of the pain, which is the relief coming forth in these patterns of vibrational threads, ‘surfacing,’ as a part of our healing life path of greater self realization. Until we embrace them, they will show up in another aspect of our life, because we carry the vibrational fields within us where ever we go.

We start by slowing down, acknowledging those things in the body that carry a wealth of information to us — how we sit, what we eat and how it tastes, the music we like or dislike, the pleasures and pains of life that in the past we may have walked by because of our beliefs that have arisen purposefully for our ego to shroud us.

We give ourselves space to go inward, allowing any demons to come forward that are asking to be seen. With each sensation, we grant passage a little more to what is asking to be felt. If we become overwhelmed, we slow further, focusing on the breath, waiting until we are ready to hear what is being called forth.

With each new day, we set loving intentions, thanking the light that has come to both reveal, and warm those parts that have been cold. We learn to hold ourselves with nurturing, placing our hand upon the heart in loving compassion, knowing that the one we have been waiting for is coming, bringing with them relief upon which we may reside.

We trust in the universe, the reflections that are in our lives, setting aside judgement and opinion, giving ourselves freedom to observe with an open heart. And as we develop our practice, we come to realize our future self, the expression of who we already are, watching over us with deep mindfulness, love, and a wisdom from each ‘allowing’ in our life path.

May it be so, so it is.

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“Listening to our relationship needs”

“Listening to our relationship needs”

By James Anthony Curtis

It’s very common when we start to really get into the meat of it, to feel overwhelmed by the emotional debris that are triggered in our relationships.

As emotions arise out of habitual patterns and behaviors, we may find ourselves trapped in obsessional thought, spinning in the flesh of compulsion, seeking some or any relief as we are tossed about. But even though these often painful repetitive patterns of insanity plague us at times, it is in these very patterns that we become aware of our emotional debris that are arising for healing.

Relief is coming forward as we embrace the difficult feelings that surface to be acknowledged, felt, and held with loving compassion as no one as can.

The body in all its wonderful wisdom is a powerhouse of informative vibration. Mini-recordings of events past are stored in our vessel down to the cellular level; desires that we may or may not be aware of begin to surface when we are ready to receive the light of love upon them in their revealing. We gain perspective by loving the heart through all that we feel, allowing ourselves the space to explore and come to know previously darkened parts of the self.

Further, as we grant ourselves permission to see without judgment or opinion into present and past relationships, with love as our anchor, we abide in the feelings that the circumstances have triggered for our acknowledgment.

We gain clarity through feeling our feelings, discovering that we were not out to harm ourselves or others, but were only attempting to fulfill unmet needs crying out within us for love. Our subconscious knows of no other way to communicate with us, other than to trigger circumstances abundant in life that will release emotional debris that are wanting. So if we are craving attention, and really didn’t want someone who would treat us poorly, this might be the exact person we attract to awaken us to the existing transmitting vibration within ourselves, showing us a reflection of how we have treated ourselves, and are in need of our own loving attentive care.

When ready, we immerse ourselves deeper into arising feelings, acknowledging our preferences, allowing ourselves to observe the emotional debris that hold the keys to each heart desire. As we follow the breadcrumbs of our bliss, the universe will respond by continuing to create outer circumstances in support of our self-realization.

We slow down, allowing the body to breathe, appreciating both the pain and the joy of our revealing, knowing that we have asked for this depth, as our life path unfolds precisely in the manner needed for love to step forth, claiming our inheritance, as the one we already are.

May it be so, so it is.