“Listening to our relationship needs”

“Listening to our relationship needs”

By James Anthony Curtis

It’s very common when we start to really get into the meat of it, to feel overwhelmed by the emotional debris that are triggered in our relationships.

As emotions arise out of habitual patterns and behaviors, we may find ourselves trapped in obsessional thought, spinning in the flesh of compulsion, seeking some or any relief as we are tossed about. But even though these often painful repetitive patterns of insanity plague us at times, it is in these very patterns that we become aware of our emotional debris that are arising for healing.

Relief is coming forward as we embrace the difficult feelings that surface to be acknowledged, felt, and held with loving compassion as no one as can.

The body in all its wonderful wisdom is a powerhouse of informative vibration. Mini-recordings of events past are stored in our vessel down to the cellular level; desires that we may or may not be aware of begin to surface when we are ready to receive the light of love upon them in their revealing. We gain perspective by loving the heart through all that we feel, allowing ourselves the space to explore and come to know previously darkened parts of the self.

Further, as we grant ourselves permission to see without judgment or opinion into present and past relationships, with love as our anchor, we abide in the feelings that the circumstances have triggered for our acknowledgment.

We gain clarity through feeling our feelings, discovering that we were not out to harm ourselves or others, but were only attempting to fulfill unmet needs crying out within us for love. Our subconscious knows of no other way to communicate with us, other than to trigger circumstances abundant in life that will release emotional debris that are wanting. So if we are craving attention, and really didn’t want someone who would treat us poorly, this might be the exact person we attract to awaken us to the existing transmitting vibration within ourselves, showing us a reflection of how we have treated ourselves, and are in need of our own loving attentive care.

When ready, we immerse ourselves deeper into arising feelings, acknowledging our preferences, allowing ourselves to observe the emotional debris that hold the keys to each heart desire. As we follow the breadcrumbs of our bliss, the universe will respond by continuing to create outer circumstances in support of our self-realization.

We slow down, allowing the body to breathe, appreciating both the pain and the joy of our revealing, knowing that we have asked for this depth, as our life path unfolds precisely in the manner needed for love to step forth, claiming our inheritance, as the one we already are.

May it be so, so it is.

“Cry little one, cry”

 

“Cry little one, cry”

By James Anthony Curtis

“It very much seems like a very large opening, but when you arrive, you find it to be to small to pass through…” said Neeker.

“But how is that we are allowed to perceive such a grand thing, yet, we are not allowed through?” asked Tumble.

“Oh its not that we aren’t allowed through, we can only approach it when ready. Its sort of like ‘seeing’ in the first place,’ said Neeker, “you are just there, and this thing comes along, you see it, and then it happens!”

“What happens!?”

“Voom!”

“Voom!?!”

“Well, maybe it doesn’t exactly sound like that” said Neeker, “but it does very much feel like that, at least to me.”

“Voom?”

“Don’t try so hard to understand, just feel” said Neeker, “these are very different times, and its much harder using words to share. The place we came from was very brilliant, and there was little in the way between folks, truth was embraced, everything very transparent, revealing much of all energy.”

“Things seem so dark here, confusing to me,” Tumble said, “and I hurt frequently when I open, like thousands of tiny things poking my insides.”

“That’s just your light,” said Neeker, “its coming through allowing you to see. Seeing is always the hard part because we try to understand what we see.”

“I feel like crying frequently’ said Tumble.

“Then cry little one, cry. Be with that part of you that aches for love, that only misses who you are, and desires to feel, coming forth to be acknowledged.”

“What happens to the pain as I feel?” said Tumble.

“The pain is only an indication of your revealing, once you realize who you are, you have fulfilled all desire, and there is no need crying out” said Neeker.

“No more tears?” said Tumble.

“There will always be new desires,” said Neeker, “but as we grow we learn to be fulfilled in who we are, rather than grasping at ourselves outside of heaven.”

“I feel better,” said Tumble.

“Truth does that,” said Neeker, “sometimes it hurts at first, but then we can breath a little easier after.”

“Building bridges”

“Building bridges”

By James Anthony Curtis

Sometimes we give an accounting to ourselves for what we have been offering to humanity.

With each interaction comes an opportunity to unfold the blessings of our uniqueness, the vibrational ripples of our essence, as our life path through time manifests the desires of our heart.

We may not always understand the reflections that appear, but as we begin to embrace all relationships with ambiguity, the expansion that is revealed forms a bond with the integrity offering an innocence that frees our heart to follow its bliss.

So we build bridges, and as the water rises, our passage forth becomes more magnificent, blending with the beauty of our difficult circumstances.

The relationships around us mirror both places in need, and those parts that feel safe enough to express themselves. Life flows deep, uninterrupted by the embracing of our heart, as we learn to walk grounded in all that we create.

May we go into our fears, be with the pain, turn to loving compassion, allowing hard truths to present their light, granting passage over each expanse, as precious wings unfold through every breath.

May we move when moved, dance when the music sounds, and embrace the realizing power in all that we do, for the healing of our souls, as love guides us into all that we are.

May it be so, so it is.?

 

“Enemy ‘Mine“

“Enemy ‘Mine“

By James Anthony Curtis

Some truths are so difficult to be with, we must go to great lengths before we may be willing to see them, acknowledging the various parts as they arise from the darkness.

We may provoke our enemy, feeling the confrontation within us, acting out in various forms as we seek resolution to the agitation we feel.

If we attempt to deny, ignore, or kill the demons that plague us, they only steep further, making their brew stronger, awaiting for perfection to bring forth each revealing in time.

Every life path becomes a potential short fall, as the “enemy ‘mine'” stalks us, seemingly goading us to retribution, for our lack of attention.

From an early age the demons are fed, growing stronger with our wanting, seething, as life presents her precious treasures before our feet.

“Grasping,” becomes our universe, pain it’s watchword, as we struggle for some ground to hold firm in, to live in peaceful contentment.

At our end, we may come to our rest, which is the finality of our truth, the healing we have long awaited for, in the realization of all that we ever wanted, which is ourselves, through the embracing of our enemy in being.

So we abide, as we become aware, that the one that arises in our difficult emotions, is here to help us, revealing hard truths, with every opportunity we acknowledge in circumstances.

‘Mine’ is apart of our process, of coming forth, claiming our inheritance, as we ascend in each unfolding.

The child, the lonely one, wanting nothing more than to be held, loved, given shelter in a storm of impermanence.

May we embrace our grasping, feeling into each part, abiding with love, holding the heart, giving space for the one asking as no one else can, healing, for the benefit of all beings.

May it be so, so it is.?

“Opportunities abound”

“Opportunities abound”

By James Anthoy Curtis

With every day comes a myriad of challenges to our nervous system. Some pleasant, others difficult, either might easily overwhelm our sense of wellbeing.

As we learn over time, our earthen vessels require certain things that will help us thrive in our journey here.

Some vessels require specific foods, amounts, others deep rest, everything from the way we sit, our activities, all with a mix of vibration in a body perfectly designed for this timeline.

Learning of our needs comes through listening, as sensations arise for our feeling.

To often it’s easy to be carried away by our mind, involved in the day, ignoring feelings that surface for what we believe are our responsibilities of life, and in doing so we place ourselves on a waiting list to be heard.

While our earthly jobs, relationships, home, and car maintenance, may be apart of our pilgrimage here, they are all ‘parts’ to our larger responsibility to ourselves, giving way to the one desiring to be loved, heard, witnessed, held by ourselves as no one else can.

With each encounter, in each new day, “opportunities abound” for us to be with all that arises; each feeling, every sensation, are both guideposts and measured ripples, come forth for our expression of divinity to fellowship with.

As we practice allowing ourselves to be with what we feel, with loving kindness lit in our hearts, we begin to view difficult circumstances as friends, teachers, companions, and potential, for all that we desire to come forth in manifesting.

So we embrace our current when ready, giving ourselves over to universal self, relying, leaning heavily on love with all that burdens us.

We thank the light of the universe, for all that it reveals, trusting in divine nature, as our eternal course flows where it wills.

May we breath easy, knowing it will all work out, even in the most difficult of circumstances, we are being set free, loved, held up by creation, as life unfolds for our highest destiny in its revealing.

May it be so, so it is.

“Feeling into differences”

“Feeling into differences”

By James Anthony Curtis

Isn’t it interesting how some things trigger us, the “differences” as we perceive them, what they draw up for us, and how they affect our relationships?

A common practice is to listen to the vibration underneath the words, what we feel is being triggered within us, coming forth in our emotions.

The universe has a way of “reflecting” frequently what we need for our journey, even in the most difficult of feelings, those parts that surface are only surfacing for wellbeing to come forth. It may appear as agitation, insecurities, anxiety, longing, whatever arises are those places asking for attention.

The illusion is to get so caught up in outer circumstances, that we forget we have asked for things to unfold through our existing vibration. Which begs the question, “how do I shift my existing vibration to garner experiences more to my liking?

The bigger “me,” or “us,” “universal self” always knows the deeper truth to this, the one in which life here incarnated is really a blink of an eye, that the desires we really want to manifest are eternal “shifts,” much deeper than fleeting pleasures.

So those events that unfold, are really here to bring us closer to the parts of self previously in the dark, ignored, or “shunned,” to love those parts in need, that are longing to be held.

As we become aware, it’s like living a multidimensional life, one that is eternal, another three dimensional, and still others both singular and plural in being.

The gift in all of this has been a connection, realization, that on a three dimensional level often goes unacknowledged,
because most of us are unaware of the other dimensions that coexist, which ends up leaving a person feeling “alone,” though the deeper truth is far greater, more loving, and beautiful than we could possibly imagine.

May we embrace the differences for what they reveal, those parts in need of love, attention, and deep healing.

When we are ready, may we come to know the one we have been waiting for, the love we already are, in benefit to all beings.

May it be so, so it is.

“Of the wild ones”

“Of the wild ones”

By James Anthony Curtis

We desire to let our hair down, the feet feel the urge within us, and our gratitude springs forth to dance a little jig.

And wonder why we restrain ourselves, what holds us back from the motion in the body? How is it that we are not capable of being honest, with the most simple tones, and lock down the earth from vibrating our current?

 

Freedom has many various forms, and the ego’s job is to press in upon us, until such a time as we are ready to receive the gifts of our abundance.

We will become stiff, our joints full of pain, as apart of our darkness weighing in on us for the pressure of our healing.Each part asking in its own way for the release we have  long desired, encumbering us with friends such as doubt, longing, loneliness and fear.

Agitation and frustration stir this mix, brewing its difficult concoction of toxicity like some ancient potion of old, waiting in the lab of the body, as a “mirror, mirror” to reflect our needs.

It’s easy to search outside, become lost in the confusion of outer circumstances, as we feel what we feel in our wanting.

We try to placate our desires only to find we have applied temporary bandaids on deep wounds, and in our rigidness we snap, finally open to see the truths that have been shadowing our seeking.

We release the wild ones, and as they come forth, we realize all that we have desired, all that we must give lovingly to ourselves.

No one will fill the emptiness we feel, no thing will retrieve our innocence, so with all the friends of our dark that have gathered, we hold the heart in every arising for our wellbeing.

May we welcome the one we have waited for, as we abide in the days of our discomfort, feeling both the joy and the sadness in the energy of all things.

May we search in unsuspecting places, as we open the door to a heart safely held, in the inner chambers of our walking.

May we love, in every chance come to free us, as the one we already are, in benefit for all beings.

May it be so, so it is.

“B movies, wet camping, and soggy shoes”

“B movies, wet camping, and soggy shoes”

By James Anthony Curtis

Late night last night the stars came out after a pleasant rain, the campfire crackled its warm tones, and the sharing continued.

“Fellowship,” the acknowledgment and connection of a similar journey, along a well walked road of humanity, granting each life path the healing process of love.

In each breath we find an amazing opportunity of self realization, “parts” coming forth as needed to be made manifest in our union of unlikely allies walking each other home.

Once feared adversaries, ominous whispers of our delight, now reveal all that we have been asking for, as we step into the night.

Out of the chaos, comes melodious banding, with old wounds we allow ourselves to explore, deep rhythms from past times ignored.

Though the road is long, our path difficult at times, we find even in our darkest hours if we are open, surrendering to the feelings that arise, we are set free.

In the fullness of our expression, all nature bends to the truth coming forth, as we blossom in our unfolding, gently offering our perception with bowed reverence.

We honor “B movies, wet camping, and soggy shoes,” as we joust for contentment round the campfire of our stars, well wishing for others, in the love we already are.

May we acknowledge our heritage, the connections however they flourish, as we laugh at our humanity, flowing on in its various forms.

With each breath may we sit, as the divine tortoise of old, ancient in wisdom, as love never grows up, but ever on in the fold.

Be blessed, be beautiful, be brave, you are loved.

“That which we have come to love”

“That which we have come to love”

By James Anthony Curtis

In Cook Forest this weekend amongst the “tall standing people.” Always a pleasure to come back to this sacred place where so many life altering circumstances have unfolded.

The forecast as per usual with the spring weather never ceases to amaze, as it shifts with the local feel of the ripple reflected in those that gather here.

With each determination, twist in personal adventures to arrive, every heart comes to find an energetic blessing in their travels.

A pilgrimage of sorts, not unlike a rite of passage once experienced by our ancestors, of necessity to unlock the inner chambers we all must eventually embrace.

The most precious moments are those that lay hidden in the rough, the ones we more commonly might pass by, in day to day living as we walk on.

Within each breath though, the groundwork of our healing comes forth as predestined, most out of the intimate comfort nature provides, as we allow our emotions to proceed as needed.

What comes forth is our desire, the hidden truths that have journeyed with us in creation, making manifest our reality we sought to experience.

Those parts that we deem “negative, unworthy,” and “unfit” for our being, are precisely that which we came to love.

May we hear the ancient ones calling to us, the “tall standing” people of our nature, deeply rooted in the love we have been waiting for, that we already are, in benefit to all beings.

May we answer the call when ready, receiving the blessings of our inheritance, as children of the great “I Am.”

May we love, as we have never loved before, all that we have come to love, that we may be fulfilled, in our path as healers of humanity, and beyond.

May it be so, so it is.

“Missing ‘Me'”

“Missing ‘Me'”

By James Anthony Curtis

My mother and I had a very unique relationship, very old souls, yet very youthful in our play.

We would often play jokes on each other, pushing the limits of our friendship, but knowing just how far we could go.

One Halloween we had made an effigy dressed up in old farm clothes, sat it out front on the porch to scare trick or treaters come for their goodies (yes our playfulness extended to others☺).

All night long there were little shrieks of terror followed by laughing delight at our prank.

Some families approached the porch cautiously expecting a “live” someone in the skeleton mask set up to jump up and grab them, but it silently sat and did its job, effectively well enough in everyone’s mind.

After hallows eve we left Fred (yup, named him too) up for the fall weather, as winter moved closer with colder winds picking up, threatening to eventually snow.

Mother would go to bingo a couple of times a week, and the imp in me got the better one night while she was away. I gently moved “Fred” inside the front door to a recliner, where mom would conveniently have to lean over to turn the lamp on. I fell asleep before she got home that night, but the next morning she exclaimed, “you scared the dickens out of me last night with Fred!”

Mother wasn’t one to let a little payback fester, soon enough, one weekend I was out with friends having a few drinks, expecting to come home, crawl into a warm bed upstairs, but instead there was someone in my bed! I thought, “that’s strange, what the…” reaching over to turn the lamp on in my room (yes, had to reach across my bed) I found myself face to face with Fred all tucked in waiting for me!

I’m not sure what moms reaction to him in the recliner was, but I about peed my pants, half in fear, half I couldn’t believe she dragged that thing upstairs and put in my bed laughing!

Perfect. It was beautifully perfect, and a wonderful relationship that I’m so grateful to have had.

For years after I moved out of the house, mom would call me at night to say goodnight before we both went to dreamland.

Usually around ten o’clock I would get the call, her saying “it’s me!” and me saying on the other end, “hello me!”

Although I miss that “me” greatly, somehow sharing here, now, I feel like “me” is not that far away. That maybe in the larger picture of things, we are all “me,” and we never really understand fully the embrace we give ourselves, until we are open to believing, to seeing the “me,” turned upside down as “we.”

Maybe we allow ourselves to feel the love that we have come to receive, to give others, and bless our relationships for all to experience healing.

May we embrace our “me’s,” as no one else can, letting each heart beat know and acknowledge the beauty of our breath in creation.

May we feel safe, opening our heart to the love of many, that the few, or one, may emerge that we have been waiting for, that we already are, for the benefit of all beings.

May it be so, so it is.